Why I’m Leaving
Friday will be my last day at Mix 106. Before I get into why I made this monumental decision in my life, let me clear up a few things.
This decision was mine. I was not asked to leave. Just the opposite. I’ve been asked to stay every day since I informed my team. I was even asked 60 seconds before I made the announcement on air, if I was sure I wanted to do this. I’m not leaving because of something that happened at Mix 106 or because I’m unhappy here. I am not going to another radio station. I’m not going to work in television. Hopefully that will put all rumors to rest.
When I graduated from CSU, I gave myself until I was 30 to “make it in radio.” This had nothing to do with a paycheck. It had everything to do with finding a co-host and show where my bold personality could shine. Two years later, I “made it.” The minute I met Mike Kasper, we had instant chemistry. The first words out of my mouth involved a sarcastic remark about his frosty blonde tips. He laughed and we never looked back. The type of chemistry we have, doesn’t come fast and easy in radio. Either you have it or you don’t. We never had to work at that part. We've been bantering like brother and sister for almost 15 years. I never noticed the microphone. To me, I’m having a conversation with my best friend and there are 12 people listening in. Then you add Mix 106 to the equation and my definition of “making it” got even better. I literally can say, I’ve worked with the best co-host, on the best radio station, with the best team; the best co-workers; the best managers and had the best listeners! This is beyond my wildest dream of what I was hoping for when I pictured my career. My cup runneth over.
So now you’re wondering what in the world could have happened to cause me to leave my dream career. You need to know, this was not a quick decision. I’ve been wrestling with this for a while and have been in talks with my managers and Mike for months about different options. But in the end, I couldn’t silence the noise. I blame the wild child within me. Her lust for life is endless. She craves new adventures. She looks at a mountain and wonders what’s on the other side. She gets restless and is constantly wondering what else she can learn from this big wide world. It started out as a whisper and then the volume kept getting louder, to the point I couldn’t ignore it anymore.
I always thought I would retire with Mike on the radio. And then the wild child starting screaming. That conflict made this decision heart breaking for me. I love Mike. He is my family (so you’re stuck with me now Mike). He’s been the most supportive, loving, caring, patient, friend to me. He puts up with my stubbornness. He pretends that he doesn’t notice how crabby I am from 5-5:30 each morning. He listens when I freak out and doesn’t make me feel crazy. He never once made the comment that wearing a different hoodie with the same jeans and baseball cap every day does not equal clean clothes. He created a safe place for me to truly be myself. He likes the fact that I don’t think before I speak; I’m sarcastic; I’m a horrible speller; I’m goofy; I’m sassy; and I’m willing to put it all out there and risk looking ridiculous. He has supported me through this decision from the start, even though it’s not at all what he wants. He never made me feel guilty for following my heart and throwing a wrench into his world. For that, I’m forever grateful.
I’m also forever grateful to you. How do I even begin to thank you for being the best 12 Listeners in the world? You welcomed me into your lives the minute I moved here from Colorado. I know I was quite a shock to Boise radio when I arrived. I don’t think or speak like most women. We all know I’m more of a man than Mike and you still embraced me. You’ve loved me for all my quirks. You might not have agreed with every quick witted comment that came out of my mouth (or that fact that I never jumped on the BSU bandwagon), but you loved me just the same. You have to know, all I ever wanted to do was make you smile and laugh at least once on your drive to work. That was my intention every single day. I know I’ve hit some hot buttons, but please remember, all I wanted was for you to laugh with me.
I’ve saved every email (and tried to reply to them all) over the last 14 ½ years. Reading through them, reminded me of the bond that Mike & I have with you. You’re not just a radio station listener. You’re our family. You’re the reason we get up at o-dark-thirty. You’ve supported us; disagreed with us; argued with us; laughed with us; cried with us; and through it all, you stood by us. Thank you doesn’t even begin to cover it. I want you to know, spending each morning laughing with you and Mike, was my favorite part of this job.
Let me leave you with this thought, I have always been referred to as “the crazy girl on the radio.” So please remember me as the “crazy girl on the radio,” who took a crazy leap of faith into the unknown.