Drunk Old Man Locked Up for Attempted Assault with a Hammer in Idaho Falls
What the Hell?
Idaho Falls, Idaho. Here's a doozy of a question: what the hell was going through Bradley G. Howe's mind on the night of Sunday, Jan. 8?
According to a Jan. 9 news release issued by the Bonneville County Sheriff's Department, Howe, 66, was charged with:
- multiple counts of felony aggravated assault
- one count of misdemeanor DUI
- a citation of malicious injury to property
It's Hammer Time
East Idaho News reports it was approximately 7:14 p.m. when Bonneville County Dispatch received a phone call from a citizen concerned with a car parked in the middle of a busy intersection.
As the concerned citizen approached the vehicle, the passenger, later identified as 66-year-old Howe, leapt from the driver's seat in a drunken stupor and started chasing the citizen while swinging a hammer.
According to the Post Register, once Howe arrived at the citizen's car, he began bashing it with the hammer. As the citizen dialed dispatch, Howe got back into his own car and tried running the good Samaritan off the road.
Authorities later confirmed that Howe failed a field sobriety and drug screening.
Let's speculate in spectacular fashion, shall we?
Did a Home Depot commercial get the best of the drunkard? Was it a trip to Ace Hardware that flipped his lid?
Maybe he heard that old Peter, Paul, and Mary song on the oldies station earlier that day? Don't remember the tune? Allow us the privilege of refreshing your melodic memory:
If I had a hammer
I'd hammer in the morning
I'd hammer in the evening
All over this land
I'd hammer out danger
I'd hammer out a warning
I'd hammer out love between
My brothers and my sisters
All over this land...
-Peter, Paul, and Mary's If I Had a Hammer
Composed by Pete Seeger and Lee Hayes in 1949, perhaps the song's Bolshevik inuendo persuaded Howe to take to the hammer and swing away. Whatever his muse, it made for a fantastically-bizarre story.