What I Learned Living Without My Family

It has been 61 days since I have lived with my family. By 8pm tonight I will finally have my boys in my arms, ready to start our lives as a family in the Treasure Valley. I can hardly believe this day is here, the time waiting has felt an eternity. And while I'm excited to have my missing pieces back, I did learn a lot about myself in these two solo months, for which I'm grateful.

I am a spoiled woman. I very rarely had to do laundry or dishes. Bathrooms were almost always cleaned by the time I'd decide to clean them. I never had to clean up a mess left on the stove. My husband would take care of these things without complaint. I always knew I was lucky for it, but being here without him really woke me up. There's nobody to clean up my mess but myself and I high key hate it. I won't lie, I probably will let Tim resume those duties, but I'm to a point where I minimize the mess as I'm making it so it's not so bad afterward. So at least that?

On a more serious note, I learned I'd been giving myself no credit for my mental and emotional strength. I'm a highly sensitive and insecure person, which is heightened surely by my anxiety. And I'd let those traits hold me back for fear of failure for longer than I'd care to admit. But somehow I took a leap of faith to uproot my entire life for this opportunity, despite knowing I'd be at it alone for a bit. And here I am working, living, thriving! (Is that a new basic girl wall decal, or what?)

I definitely still feel out of my depth in certain ways, but I feel confident enough to ask questions, take risks, make mistakes, and all the other cheesy stuff women say when they discover strength they never knew they had. It's an enthralling adventure to say the least...but I'm happy to have my family back.