Dear Mike, and Nicole,

My name is Dennis. I live here in the Treasure Valley. My wife and I have been married for 16 wonderful years. This is both of our second marriages. I have a son from my first marriage that is grown, and living on his own. My wife has no kids from her first marriage, but we have two kids together. A boy that is 14, and a girl who is 12. Personally speaking I feel we have a great marriage. I truly felt like I’m married to my best friend.

The problem- I recently discovered Facebook notifications on our Ipad from another man. There were probably 6 notifications from this guy. My wife and I both know this guy from our kids being on the same wrestling team. We all would normally sit together at meets, talk, and cheer on our kids. He is recently divorced,  I looked at my wife with the Ipad in hand and jokingly, but somewhat seriously asked, “Should I be worried?” She got kind of red faced, and immediately said that there was nothing to be worried about, and that they were both friends. She also seemed irritated that I found the notifications on the Ipad. Basically what she told me was that they started talking towards the end of wrestling via text messages. Mostly about food and exercise.She immediately offered to let me see every message that they had shared, but I declined.Friday night I had to work, and came home to see her in her exercise clothes. I asked if she went and worked out, and she told me that she went and worked out with Mark at his apartments exercise facility, and that they also went out for ice cream afterwards which he paid for. To put it mildly I was angry as hell! In my eyes if everything is innocent then why not come out and tell me this before it ever takes place? When asked, she has never tried to cover anything up, or lie to me, but it’s the not telling me that really bothers me. I have friends of the opposite sex at work, but I would never think of hanging out with another woman outside of work. Am I just old fashion? My wife has apologized numerous times, and always states that she is just too nervous to tell me.

Please help! I need to know if I’m blowing this out of proportion, or if I’m justified in being extremely nervous about this whole situation.



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