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OPP-Would You Tell Your Friend They Are Getting Fired?

On Today’s OPP, a listener knows that her friend is going to get fired. She wants to know if she should tell or let the boss do it? There are a few details that make this tricky.

Other People’s Problems 2/11/14

Darko Komorski

Dear Mike & Kate- I work with one of my very good friends. We have been friends for almost 10 years.  I have been with the company almost 2 years. My friend has been here over 8 years. She was the one who got me the job. She put in a good word for me and helped me tweak my resume so that it fit what the hiring manager was looking for. I love my job! I’ve never been happier. I really seem to flourish in this position. My director has talked to me about becoming a manager. I have been going through some manager in training meetings and sessions. In one of these meetings, I found out that my friend who got me this job is going to be let go at the end of the month.

This came up in a meeting and then one of the other directors immediately changed the subject saying it was inappropriate to be discussing this in that setting. The problem is now I know. My friend will be devastated. She thinks everything at work is great. The other day at lunch she told me that she is planning on taking her family to Disneyland for spring break next month. She was talking about searching out airlines and doing something extra special for the kids. I know she wouldn’t spend this money if she knew the paycheck was going to stop.

Do I owe it to her to tell her that she is getting let go? On the flip side, I don’t want to jepoardize my job and my chance to become manager with this company. If anyone found out that I shared that info from that meeting, it might hurt my chances of getting this promotion. Then I am torn thinking about how I would want to know if it was me. And if my friend ever found out that I knew and didn’t tell her, our friendship would be over. She would be so hurt. What should I do?

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