OPP: Should We Let Our Son Quit School And Move Back Home
Mike and Nicole we need your help!!
Our 18 year old son went off to college this past year. He started as a freshman in August at Southern Utah University on a full soccer scholarship. All semester he has been calling and emailing me telling me how homesick he is and he wants to quit school and come home and enroll in Treasure Valley Community College. I was so sad for him. I thought he would love college, especially being a part of the soccer team. I really thought he would submerge himself in college life. He is our second oldest and I figured he would just follow in his brother’s footsteps and get a 4 year degree without batting an eye. My husband and I were about to give him permission to quit school after he completes this semester and stay home through the summer and then enroll in TVCC in in the Fall. That was until we found out the truth. He is not homesick…at least not for us. He wants to come back so he can be near his girlfriend who is in 11th grade! They met over the summer and I figured they were just texting and emailing all semester but apparently she goes down there as much as she can and has now convinced him he should give up his full ride and come back to Idaho so they can go to community college together. Now that we know this, we are not so supportive of his reasons to come back. My husband says no way. We have to make him stay. He will regret it for the rest of his life. My husband says that if he does quit school he can’t come home. He needs to get a job and find a new place to live. I completely agree with my husband that our son is making a huge mistake but I don’t think we should shun him. As parents it’s our responsibility to take care of our son no matter what his choices. We were going to let him move home when we thought it was just homesickness. We asked why his girlfriend couldn’t join him after she graduates and he says they don’t want to wait that long to be together. I know at some point you have to let them go and make their own way in the world, mistakes and all, but what is the point of be a parent if you can’t share the life lessons you learned? Is there anyway to convince our son that throwing everything away for a high school romance is the biggest mistake he will ever make? How do I convince my husband that we can’t just turn our back on our son?
A Mom in Meridian