On OPP today, a man has realized something about his future in-laws and is struggling with the decision of telling his family or saying nothing. What would you do?

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Other People's Problems June 3rd 2014

Mike and Kate-
I have been married for 23 years. 18 years ago I cheated on my wife. I was young, dumb and no mature enough to be married. I never told my wife. And we have gone on to make an amazing life for ourselves. We have 3 great kids. I have a successful construction business that my wife handles the books and payroll for. We have a second home in McCall. Our oldest son just came home from school after his junior year at Utah State. He has been dating a girl since last fall and after finals a few weeks ago, he proposed to her. She is also from Idaho. She and her family live in Twin Falls. They all came up last weekend to McCall so the two families could meet and get to know each other since we will be family in December. When this girl and her parents walked into our home, I about died. Her mother is the woman I cheated with 18 years ago. I couldn't believe it. We both went completely white when we saw each other. She was not married when we got together but apparently a year later they met and got married. It was the most awkward and uncomfortable weekend of my life. I was trying my best not to act strange so my family wouldn't suspect anything. Now that they have all gone back to Twin Falls, I feel a little better but am really struggling with how this is going to work? They are going to be a part of my life forever from here on out. If I come clean to my family, I risk loosing them. I risk loosing all that we have built as a family. Plus is it fair to my wife to dump this on her only to release my own guilt. And if they find out what is my son going to think? Will this break up his relationship because it's just too much hurt? Those were my thoughts and after thinking about all that, I made up my mind to keep my mouth shut. That was until I got an email from this woman. She wants to tell everyone and get it out in the open and come clean so our kids have no baggage dragging them down as they go forward into their new life. She says there is no way she can see me for the rest of our lives knowing what we did and keep that from her husband. I am in a full panic. Please give me some great words of advice to pass on to this woman so I can change her mind. I think telling would just be selfish because we would be dumping all this on our spouses and only hurting them, not helping them. And please read this for OPP soon. We are spending the 4th of the July at our cabin.

Thanks,
Dad in Distress

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